Car Horn C*nts
Blare your turbo charged air horn,
Escape hastily my wrath of scorn,
You speed by inches from my side,
That I've slowed you dents your pride,
Eager you are to shave four seconds,
Surely your destination heaven beckons?
For what other reason should I demand,
Such foul treatment from anothers hand?
There's no clarity of answer can I punt,
It must be that you're a human runt.
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I spend a fair amount of time on a bicycle per week. Now 99% of drivers who pass me are nice folk who give plenty of room letting each of us go about our business without feeling the need to intrude into one another's lives barring a nod or wave of cheer. This poem is not for them. You might have worked out this is for those who feel the need to get on the airhorn allowing me to know, if the sound of there chugging to over revving engine failed to alert me, that they are indeed behind me and that they are angry about this. To those that feel that need, I hate you all. This poem was inspired by one in particular tw*tbag whom chirped his lack of humanity at both me and Mr. V humbly making our way to Brighton (a kickass ride it was), but is for all of you.
Here here!
ReplyDeleteChipry chirpy. I think it may have been a horn of encouragement, like a sort of 'Hey guys nice job combining a healthy activity with lowering your carbon footprint- it was a pleasure sharing this strip of road with you'.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure of it.
Nope, I have received a few of those on travels long and they more go 'beep beep', what he did was 'BARP' in an angery 'I'm an important person get out of my way' action. Thus I can only conclude that he's a d*ckhead. It didn't help that on the day of posting this on my way home some pikey chav steped out into the road and said "I'm going to punch this one" and went to punch me. I stared him down hard and he failed to pull the trigger. I'm sure it was just a joke but I wasn't laughing. You might notice this is something I can vent about for some time. :)
ReplyDelete